Last summer, I got involved with this activist project that had nothing to do with Asian American stuff. The leader of the project–I’ll call him D–was one of those dudes who just had to have his voice heard on everything. He was a white man. He wanted to run the website, but when he was averaging 3 unique pageviews a day (one was me, another was him, and god knows who the other person was), I suggested some changes (since bigWOWO gets somewhat more than 3 pageviews a day). He was one of those passive aggressive types. He’d say, “Yeah, since you have web experience, you should do it,” and then he’d say something like, “What are you trying to do, take over MY website? I’m in charge here!” When I told him that he should just do his thing since he obviously knew better, he would get angry and say, “Why am I always doing the work?”
Anyway, towards the end of the summer, he decided to get racial on me. In the middle of one of our “discussions” about the website, he yelled, “Is English even your native language?” He was screaming at me and putting his hand in my face. I thought he was going to take a swing at me. (He’s around 55 years old, 140 lbs, and 5’5, so it wouldn’t have hurt.) I stood up, ready to push forward if he got violent. I’m not a violent person, but I also don’t think there’s any reason to take a punch (literally) sitting down. Another member stood between us and asked me to stand down. I spoke to this other member later about the racism that D was perpetuating, and the other member agreed that D was physically threatening and racist. I later spoke to D about it too and called him out on his racism. His response?
He said, “You’re acting like a brat. I will continue to talk to you like I talk to my children.” Translation: “You’re a man of color, and therefore I will call you a ‘BOY.’”
Racism is a disease that doesn’t go away.
In any case, I didn’t have the support of the rest of the group. Most agreed that D was a racist prick, but because he had more money and standing in the community (even though he somehow eventually weaseled out of paying a single penny of the money he pledged to the cause), most felt–probably correctly, I’ll admit–that they had to go along with whatever shenanigans came out of his mouth. They agreed (and I agreed) that it might be better if I stepped down and let the group become a bit more, um, homogeneous for the sake of getting stuff done. Only problem is they never got anything done. Both of the black members left the group soon after. The rest of the group (all white, thanks to the leadership) eventually broke up. We let little Hitler run the show, but unlike the real-life Hitler, this Hitler wasn’t so good at carrying out campaigns.
Anyway, I like the picture and quote above. It puts things into perspective. If you ever run into a D, use the picture to laugh at the situation.
It’s his loss, the team’s loss and the cause’s loss, not yours.
But it’s a really good lesson on how good projects need good people on it.
Why would anyone think it is okay to follow someone like this regardless of their status or financial???
I can think of only two possibilities: lack of experience or foresight.
Maybe a third possibility: lack of backbone.
That should be “financial standing” at the end.
Option three sounds the most plausible after re-reading this.
Hilarious picture.
Z/Raguel:
Before I left, one of the white women told me, “We need him, Byron. That’s just the way it is–without him, we’ve got nothing. He’s got all the contacts and he’s brought in the most money.” (He did bring in one very large donation, although as I said, not a penny from his own wallet.)
In the end, it didn’t matter since they tossed in the towel anyway. I have no idea what their views of D were, but it had to be somewhat disconcerting to have a group suddenly get cut in half because the colored people had to leave, basically at D’s direction. It’s like a big elephant in the middle of the room, regardless of how much you care about the cause. It’s one thing to force people out because of their views, but to force people out because of race? I imagine that was awkward.
There were lots of lessons here. My biggest lessons were these:
1. One person can ruin an entire movement. It only takes one. Don’t ever hesitate to try to force a person from a group if you have big doubts about their abilities to perform. Better to remove them early rather than later.
2. ALWAYS document promises. There need to be metrics with any goals. I should’ve documented and put D’s promises in writing. This way it’s easier to force someone out. You can say, “Hey, you promised X but didn’t deliver X.” D promised $5,00o of his own money but wound up paying nothing. He essentially bought control of the organization with just a (broken) promise.
This one may have been a losing battle regardless, but it was highly instructive.
The thing was, his attitude really wasn’t all that different from the guy in the picture. His attitude was, “I’m white, and so are most of the people in this group, so what are you going to do?” One of the other white guys was highly offended by his racism, but it was already too late to change course. If we had focused earlier on actual achievements, we could have forced him out earlier.
All white people are racist, deep down inside. This starts at the age of 3-4 years at minimum. And also, only white people can be racist. N.E. Asians, black people, and Hispanics cannot be racist because it comes from the historical perspective.
Flank, all white people are not racist. Can you prove that? WTF?! At 3-4 years old? I wasn’t aware of those feelings at that age. Blacks can be racist. Angry Asian Man reports that Blacks attack Asian people. Remember the Rodney King riots? Korean stores were burnt to the ground.
I don’t hate any race. But let’s get the facts right, here.
Siegfried, you cracker, yes structural racism. You racist against homosexuals I bet too, huh?
I don’t hate anybody. I don’t agree with the Gay lifestyle. Besides, it was a Black football player who made that statement about Gays.
Ahem, to my earlier point, even babies can be racist. See here: http://www.thedailybeast.com/newsweek/2009/09/04/see-baby-discriminate.html
As for the original post, I have the same opinion now as when Byron first told me about it. There is a phrase called “Going Ghetto” among Blacks that basically describes someone getting loud, insistent, and belligerent about something. As you can tell by the name, it’s generally not seen as a good thing. but every now and then, even a refined and educated Black person will tell you, “I had to get Ghetto with that clown!” Now obviously, sometimes it gets abused and misused, but many times it’s the only thing that snaps prejudiced White people into reality.
Sometimes in order to cut through the status quo, you have to get angry and loud—if you don’t , it will be seen as less than it really is. Sure, technically this is happening to you only because you are Asian, and sure we realize that this is wrong, BUT IT’S NOT REALLY RACISM THAT WE’RE SUPPORTING. We’re just saying that we need this guy for the cause, we’re not being racist, we’re just being smart. You just need to endure this discomfort FOR THE BETTER GOOD. It’s not our job to stand up against racism wherever it appears, especially when the White person has more power than everyone else.
I’m sorry, but sometimes, you have to loudly and definitively tell it like it is: “This is RACIST, and if you inany way support this, YOU ARE A RACIST TOO!” You will be surprised how many people pick the right side when you eliminate all the gray area.
Haha! King, that’s great advice, and it was certainly advice that I should’ve heeded.
And yes, that was exactly it. D wasn’t phased by charges of racism because:
1. He wasn’t phased by any kind of failure, whether of personality or by achievement. He owned his restaurant because his wife happens to be a good cook, and she does all the work. He raised all his money from one donor, and it didn’t phase him that he broke all his promises to the group.
2. He was racist, and he knew it.
Now the rest of the group was exactly as you said. They were just kind of quiet on the issue. They didn’t want to be perceived as racist, and they weren’t actively racist, but they definitely supported him there. I don’t know if we would’ve won, but going ghetto probably would have had better results.
I think going ghetto would work if the group could be weaned off their financial dependence on that twerp, but probably wouldn’t otherwise as I think that’s the root cause of their slack indulgence.
By the way Flank, are you retarded? BABIES are racist now? God are you retarded.
Back to the conversation, the two points on group cohesion and documenting promises are pretty good, especially if they’re major endeavors. All the same though, I’m wondering if the financial approach could have been handled better. I wonder if there are any articles out there regarding financial management or financial politics for movements and NGOs, as I dimly discern there are some subtleties and differences for this purpose as opposed to normal for profit outfits. Donors for example, can infiltrate or exert pressure on a movement simply by donating money and then halting the cash flow at a critical moment, etc. In business it’s a little easier to anticipate something like this because you know who all the players are and any mafias or cartels tend to make themselves obvious as a show of strength.
Well people hate to be called out on being racist, especially when deep down, they know that what they’re doing IS racist! Just start saying stuff like, “I was warned what would happen if I tried to work with White people! I was wrong to trust in you, you’re all the SAME!” Sometimes it takes that level of shame to get them to stop think, and then turn on the source of the racism rather than the victim of it!
Haha! King, that’s awesome!
Well, something like that kinda happened (and I don’t think they come to this site, so I can be public about it). One of the white guys at the beginning did say that he was happy that “it’s not just the white people getting involved.” And then when D came out with his racism, I said, “This is EXACTLY why we non-white people don’t get involved. Racism!” (although I didn’t point the finger at him, just at D.)
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