Tony Hing Wong, July 21, 1924-October 19, 2009

My grandfather (Yeh-Yeh) Tony Hing Wong was born in China and was of Chiuchow lineage. He immigrated to this country around the age of 15. As far as I know, he is the only person in my family named Wong to immigrate. If I remember the story correctly, he loved ships and the sea, and he was able to get employment as an errand boy from the American and Australian crewmen who were shipping cargo around the world. He spoke no English at the time, and the crew communicated with him by drawing pictures and asking him to do whatever it was that they needed (his English would eventually become flawless and without even the hint of an accent). He was a fast learner, loved the sea, and loved seeing how machines worked, and so the American mariners gave him more and more responsibilities as they transported cargo back and forth across the Pacific. Sometime during his younger years while on land he also worked in restaurants.

Yeh-Yeh met my grandmother when he was twenty. His ship had docked in New York City, where my grandmother was born and raised, and they married a few years later. He took a job with United States Lines while studying for his machinist licenses. As the story was told by author George Murphy, there were many men working for the company and vying for promotion at the time, and it was extremely competitive and hard to stand out. Large ships in those days were equipped with an engine cooling system which pumped ocean water through a valve efficiently while the ships moved at high speed, but at low speeds, it required the use of a different valve which was inefficient and slammed against itself, making a big noise and creating lots of wear. Yeh-Yeh correctly predicted that such a valve could not withstand such repetitive blunt force for very long, and so he designed a new valve that softened the trauma. The company took notice, implemented the valve on all of their ships, and Yeh-Yeh’s career took off from that point. He worked his way up the chain of command, eventually becoming the first Asian American Chief Engineer (highest ranking person on the “engine” side of a ship’s operation, equal in rank to the captain), and then the first Asian American Port Engineer, a position that he held until retirement.

I learned most of the above just last week, during his funeral when I also saw, for the very first time, a picture of my Yeh-Yeh standing strong and proud in his engineering uniform. Losing a grandparent is hard because grandchildren don’t see a grandparent’s accomplishments first hand. Yeh-Yeh was 51 years old when I came into the picture, just a decade away from his retirement, and I had no idea exactly how accomplished he was. So for his professional career, I’m talking from the recollections of others.

However, there is much that I do remember:

Yeh-Yeh could fix or build anything. When he had tools in his hand, he was a one man dynamo who knew exactly how things worked. It didn’t matter if you were fixing an engine, hanging a door, or installing a large appliance, he knew how to do it, or he could figure it out. As a former chief engineer on a ship, he was familiar with all kinds of systems. Once retired, he used his know-how to help his neighbors install irrigation systems, build gardens, fix their roofs, remodel their rooms, etc.

Yeh-Yeh, during his younger years, exhibited the decorum and flair of a military officer, which was what merchant mariners became during times of war. He was a great ballroom dancer, an entertaining toastmaster, and a powerful conversationalist who knew much about everything. When in loud company, his jokes were dirty and raunchy, which is nothing less than one would expect from a man who sailed the seas.

Yeh-Yeh had a powerful and quick mind that made him adept at games. He taught me Xiangqi (Chinese Chess) and taught my cousins blackjack. In probably a hundred Chinese Chess games, I beat him only once–and I’m sure it was because he allowed me to.

Yeh-Yeh hated war. Despite the fact that he engineered war supply ships during three different wars–WWII, Korea, and Vietnam–he hated seeing people die. He eagerly cast his vote for Obama in both the primary and general election (and I hope Mr. Obama fulfills his promises about ending these wars.).  He also hated fighting and was a strong proponent of using one’s mind to solve problems peacefully. I don’t ever remember him angry.

Yeh-Yeh valued honesty. He couldn’t stand to be around negative or shady people, and he spoke his mind always.

Yeh-Yeh loved cooking. He cooked ALL of our family meals, and the extended family in New York all looked forward to the feasts he made. He made extra food for the neighborhood and made sure everyone was well fed. He had an enormous repetoire that included the potentially lethal Fugu. The banquets are what most of the family remember.

What I will remember most about Yeh-Yeh were the many fishing trips that we took when I was young and he was younger. He had a big inflatable boat with a wood bottom and outboard motor. We would load it with fishing equipment, and we would go out on the high seas out of New Jersey to fish. I remember loading that boat off of the docking ramp–guys who hung out at the ramp saw our inflatable boat, and they laughed. They wondered how a man and his grandson could go out on the high seas on such a tiny little boat with so little equipment–just a big compass (which he never even looked at), a two way radio, a tackle box, a couple of rods, an anchor, life preservers, and bait. The boat was so small that we didn’t even have to pay the docking charge; it literally slid underneath the railing.

Yeh-Yeh would take us far out, so far that we could no longer see the shore. Whenever I asked where the dock was, he’d just point confidently in one direction and say, “There.” We’d catch lots of fish, including my two most interesting catches ever, a shark and a sting ray. For lunch, we’d eat sandwiches that Yeh-Yeh had prepared. Then he’d bring us back to shore. Like a practiced mariner, he always took us straight back to the dock as if he had a GPS system in his mind. Because he was such an excellent cook, he then cooked what we caught–including the shark and the sting ray.

He passed away the morning of October 19, 2009, leaving behind his wife, three sons, eight grandchildren, and two great grandchildren. We all miss him dearly.

Yeh-Yeh, we will never forget you.

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